Holla' Daze.

Made it back to Austin in one piece. Four weeks of lunacy have finally caught up with me in the way of some gruesome flu-type bullshit that caused me to go deaf everytime one of the flights I was on went into initial descent. Yesterday, my head would throb everytime I coughed or sneezed or laughed or blinked, but that has (thankfully) subsided and today I could and did sneeze to my heart's desire. Still have a constant buzz in my head that I'm beginning to think is being caused by billions of dead brain cells having nowhere to go.

A rundown of my hollerday break:

Started it off in Austin, naturally, with my COWP muthaRTFers. Drinking felt bag after felt bag of Crown Royal (what the...?). Watched the rap videos Elliot made in Africa. Fucking genius, I tell you. Seriously amazing. Bid my colleagues a fond see-you-soon, packed my shit and headed to Chapel Hill, NC.

Almost cried when I saw Melis and Mike at the airport waiting for me. Man, I've been homesick. Went straight from the airport to the new bar Mike is a partner of. Some sort of communist republic motif going on in there. Very masculine. It took the place of GO! Studios, which was a little surreal. It looked familiar, but also wasn't. Anyway, it's not like I've never gotten drunk in that space, so it didn't take long to get comfortable. All the familiar faces made their way into my blurry sights at some point. It was comforting. For awhile before I got there, I was convinced that I missed everything about Chapel Hill. I guess that's not really the case. I miss very specific people and the type of spontaneity that exists around going out when you live in a small town and you know all the people that live there, too. You never really have to make plans. Just go to one of the bars that one of your friends owns or is employed by and poof!, you're out with friends.

It was so much fun though. Got a couple of wacky emails while I was there (...I love your silence). Threw down with my ladies Yeu-Li, Kristen, Isa, Amy Jae, Shannon (who I didn't see enough), Melissa, and the one... the only... that's right folks, Upper Decky Mormino. Are you kidding me? She might be one of the best ever created. Then, of course, there are the girls: Lyle, Mike (Peanuts) Ellis, Luke (where the hell were you?), Jebbie Downer, Richard and goddamned Jesse Paddock who intolerably lives up to his reputation as being one of the best people everyone who knows him will ever know. I laughed so hard, I seriously thought I was damaging organs. Had one of the surliest (and most delicious) holiday brunches ever concocted. Drank myself blind. Almost had a hernia watching the SNL hosted by Donald 'Wonk' Trump. People kept asking me the same questions, which I always hate, but I guess that's to be expected. I got some face time with the ones I wanted to (mostly). And when it was time for me to go, it didn't feel like I was being uprooted from home (although I am completely at home there), it felt like I was leaving the town where a bunch of friends that I love live. Left Chapel Hill and landed in Florida.

I accidentally purposely burned some bridges the last time I was in Florida, so I spent the entire 6 days hanging out with my family and driving around hunkered down in the car seat so as not to be noticed by anyone who might recognize me. It was actually really fun. The women in my family tend to be ab-surd including my puberty drenched 14-year-old cousin who is now taller than I am (fucking bizarro). There are so many inside jokes schilled out between all of us that words usually aren't necessary, just a look or a sound will suffice to have all of us rolling around like idiots. My dad is dating a doctor who just bought some swank digs right on the ocean. That didn't suck. Drinking wine in a fancy house, falling out the back door onto the beach. His lady is cool as shit, too, so I'm happy for the old man. It was good, old-fashioned, quality time with the family. The kind that needs to happen once a year. Once my time was up in Florida, I headed to NYC.

The NYC experience for me always happens before even getting to NYC. This trip was no exception. I get to the airport in Jacksonville, kiss my mom goodbye and head to my gate. When I get there the flight has been delayed so I go to sit in the bar and read while I wait. I order a drink(s) and after awhile I am lured into the conversation of the people next to me. I throw in my two cents and immediately this guy sticks out his hand and asks me my name. I shake his hand, tell him my name, he tells me his, and proceeds to keep a firm grip of my hand. Uh... what are you...? He says, "Put it together, girl." I study his face, turns out it's someone I know but didn't recognize (he had a beard last time I saw him), so OF COURSE we start flipping out, laughing our faces off, and taking shots. We figure out that we are on the same flight to New York and decide to head to the gate. When we get there the terminal is empty, departure gate door is closed. We pound our way onto the plane, which ends up being a 50 seat commuter and, of course, we are the last ones to board. And we're straight drunk. We come piling on the plane all swimmy eyed and swervy foot, I am almost positive that I used the tops of a couple of people's heads to keep my balance going down the aisle to our seats. Our steward talks like a talk show host and loves us immediately, cracking up into the mic as we throw the goat to him from the back of the plane. He doesn't even announce having booze in his drink cart, but we're pretty sure he's got some. And he does. By the time we get to New York we are fucking dopey drunk and somehow my buddy fanagles a limo to Brooklyn. So we cruise into Brooklyn in a fucking limo? I finally get to Lauren's in Chelsea, where I was staying, about four hours and many, many drinks later. I am there long enough to tell her about my flight and run-in with our mutual friend before one of our best friends, Brian, shows up ready to go out for, well, drinks. I was game. We end up at Tortilla Flats drinking 16oz PBRs while random, weirdo drunk dude (like I should talk) holds up tortilla chips end to end, trying to explain to us how tall our beers were. Oh, the antics. I had been in New York for about 3 hours at that point.

The two weeks in New York were a blur, but when thinking about it certain things pop clear as day into my mind: Brian doing the pant chaffing walk and imitating a Japanese cowboy waiter; the third degree burn on my hand (no recollection of doing it); me and Lauren dancing to Puerto Rican polka music on the street in Williamsburg on New Year's eve; the Ralph Ellison inspired photograph at the MoMA and the drop of blood on the floor that Brian and I found more perplexing than the exhibits; Indian food and heartbreak talk with Casey, Sara, and Leia (we're all better off); the hilarious yoga class I took with Lauren where she accidentally sat on my head and someone started snoring during meditation ("Breathe deep," SSSNNNNOOORRRE); Aaron Pollack, the charming, teapot carrying, felon who apparently owns most of Lower Manhattan and is NOT afraid to hug strangers; a fucking hilarious game of 90's Trivial Pursuit with Katie, Trevor and Brian (fucking floptical... so 1990's); buying prom dresses with Katie... because we need them; god damn $8.00 scotches at Amateur Night at the Apollo (hell yes!); drunken 'I love you, man' talks with Katie; Casey stumbling in drunk and proceeding to show us her goods; Katie's pre-birthday bash where our waitress bought us a bottle of wine for being so damned cool and then a night of debauchery ensued ("oops, I just ran into Chelsea Clinton and she's ugly." "Where is CBGB's at? We out looking for slits and cunnilingus." Then I think you need to be going thataway); serenading our cab driver with 'I Just Called to Say I Love You' cause he told us he liked sentimental music; OC marathon hosted by the eyebrow farmer; and the fucking HorseTray in the Ashfriend that will never, ever not be funny to me.

I didn't feel ready to leave New York. I guess I had just gotten used to being around my old peeps. About half-way back to Austin I started getting really excited about coming back. Flight arrived at sunset and certain things were obvious from the sky, the UT Tower, the Capital building. I have to say, despite my deafness, I felt a tangible happiness. It got even better when I saw my roommate's smiling face and then our sweet little abode. When I walked into my room my bed seemed like an old lover I had unknowingly been dying to see, causing me to crawl onto it and writhe uncontrollably as sounds of pleasure leaked out of my face. It was good to be gone, and now it's good to be back. Home is where the heart is, but sometimes home is where your shit is, too.